Dana's Evaluation
by Sandpiper
Summary: Scully tires to play a trick, but luck just isn't on her side


Dana

Dana's Evaluation

(Chimera post-episode)

After getting home from Bethany, Mulder stopped at home to change then headed over to Scully's apartment. He knocked on the door a couple times, then decided that she must be out so he left himself in with his key.   
"Lucy I'm home!" he called, doing an impressive Ricky Ricardo impersonation. "Hahaha I kill myself" he muttered, and started for the living room.  
"Oh yeah Mulder your a regular Jim Carrey" a voice said from behind him, he turned and saw Scully standing with her hands on her hips.   
"Ummm, Scully, I thought you weren't home yet" he said  
"I was in the bathroom" Scully explained  
"Oh" he responded, embarrassed.  
She smiled, 'he looks so cute blushing.' "You want some coffee?"  
"Sure" he said and took off his jacket, as she headed for the kitchen. She fixed the coffee, and found Mulder sitting comfortably on her couch with his shoes off. She handed him the coffee. "Thanks" he said and took a sip, as she took a seat next to him. "So on the phone you told me to come over right away," he said and waggled his eyebrows at her "been missing me these past few days Agent Scully?"  
"Mulder, we need to finish this paper work" she told him  
He sighed "Okay....what do you want me to do?"  
"Well first I want you to get your huge, smelly, feet off my coffee table," she said, "then you can get started on our expense report."  
"Don't make fun of my feet Scully, they're very talented" he said and lightly stroked her leg with his big toe, she just gave him a slightly annoyed look and handed him the report. He groaned, "why do I have to do the expense report?"  
"Because I told you to" Scully responded with out looking up from what she was working on.  
He rolled his eyes "Why don't I do this instead?" he said and picked up another report off the table.  
"Nope, I have to do that one" she said  
"What is it?" he asked  
She sighed "It's an evaluation of you"  
"Of me?!" he asked surprised  
"Yeah, yeah apparently there have been several reports of sexual harassment, so now all female agents that have male partners have to do an evaluation of them about sexual harassment." she explained  
"Oh......does that include off duty?" he asked.  
Scully laughed "You better hope not"  
"Hey your just as bad!" he said indignantly "remember that time in move theater? Who's idea was that? I do believe it was yours!"  
"Just do the paper work!" she commanded  
"Yes mother!" he replied sarcastically, and got to work.

A COUPLE HOURS LATER

Mulder sighed then rubbed his eyes. 'I think they added a couple thousand pages to the expense reports!' He glanced over and Scully. He definitely approved of her choice of outfits, tight jeans and a lose linen top which he could easily look down. Mulder smiled then forced him self to look back at the report, Scully shifted position and ended up resting her heels on his thigh. He happened to notice the color of her nail polish, it surprised him, he sort of expected light pink or lavender. Oh well it's not like the color was bad on her, it looked hot actually. 'Damn it! How the hell am I suppose to concentrate with Scully's iridescent green toes in my lap?!' he thought to himself.  
Scully, noticed Mulder moving around uncomfortably. She looked up from her work. "Problem Mulder?" she asked  
"Huh? Oh, no....no problem" he said. 'Oh god, he's wearing those glasses that give him that perfect sexy professor look!'  
"Okay" she shrugged  
"So what are you working on?" he asked  
"Oh...just my report on the stakeout" she answered  
"I'm still amazed about that!" he said  
She looked at him seriously, "You better explain statement quickly, or I might just shove this coffee cup where the sun don't shine!"  
Mulder laughed, "Scully I didn't mean it that way! You know that!" She crossed her arms and gave him The Brow. "Come on Scully, not only did you solve your case, you helped me solved mine too."  
She looked at him questioningly, "I did?"  
"Yeah, your comment about a sheep in wolf's clothing."  
"That's what lead you to figure out who it was?" she asked  
"Uh hu" he responded.  
She thought for a moment, "Well, good for me then.............so Mulder your actually telling me that this woman, Ellen Adderly, transformed into some kind of beast because she was jealous that her husband was having these affairs?"  
"Yeah" he answered earnestly.  
She smiled, "So what are you gonna call this The Case of the Green Eyed Monster?"  
"I never said it had green eyes" he smirked  
"Oh you didn't notice that Mr. Photographic Memory?" she teased  
"Well I'm sorry, I was kinda busy being nearly drowned in a bathtub!" he cried, she giggled. "Hey I did mean to ask you something though"  
"Sure, what is it?" she inquired  
"Ellen Adderly asked me if I had a "significant other", and I told her not in the widely understood meaning of that term" he explained  
"Okay" she said  
"Well I wanted to know, are you my significant other?" he asked  
"I don't know, am I?" she responded  
"Well I don't know I mean, I know to be a significant other you don't have to be married to the person but I thought maybe you didn't count because nobody knows about us" he said  
"Ahhh I see," she said, and thought for a moment, "well, I don't think there are really any rules. If you consider someone to be your significant other, and they consider you to be theirs, then it counts"  
"Do you consider me to be yours?" was of course his next question.  
"Ummmm....." Scully, shifted uncomfortably, "well.....yeah I suppose I do"  
He grinned, "Well then I suppose I do too", she smiled and shook her head.  
"Ya know, sometimes you come up with the weirdest topics of conversation" she said. He smiled at her, took off his glasses and deposited them on the table, then leaned over and started kissing her neck.  
"Mulder" she said in a warning tone  
"What?" he asked innocently, as he pulled the bottom her shirt out of her pants.  
"We can't right now" she said, he leaned down and pushed her shirt up a little.  
"Why not?" he asked dumbly  
"We still have work to do!" she said irritably  
"Oh" he said and kissed around her stomach, lightly brushing his lips against her naval.   
She groaned, "Well........maybe we can take short break" she said and tossed the report in her hand aside.  
He laughed, "I figured you'd see it my way"  
She snorted, and said "Smug son of a bitch!" then pulled him up to kiss him.

NEXT MORNING

Scully woke up first the next morning around 6 o'clock. She crept out of bed, and put on her robe, then went into the living room and saw the unfinished paper work scattered all over the table and floor. 'Skinner will probably rip me a new one for not having this done! Oh well......it was worth it' she thought to herself, the shivered deliciously at the memory. She then started gathering up the papers and noticed the sexual harassment evaluation that she never got to last night. She scanned the questions and chuckled 'Mulder damn well better hope this doesn't include off duty!' she then had an idea, she picked up a pen and filled out the questions. Then looked over them. 'He should get a kick out of that!' she thought and made a mental note to get another copy of the evaluation form to turn in. Then went to the bathroom to hop in the shower.

LATER THAT DAY

Mulder left for lunch first, so Scully took the fake evaluation form out of her brief case and laid it on his desk. She wasn't worried about someone coming in and finding it, nobody ever came down there anyway. She then picked up her coat and went to the sandwich shop, around the corner, that made her favorite Greek salads. When she was done with her lunch, Mulder was already back. She grinned at him, "So Mulder did you notice I finished that sexual harassment form?"  
"Yep, I sent it up to Skinner's office with the other paper work" he said and turned his chair around to put something in the file cabinet. Glancing over at Scully he noticed she was as pale as a ghost with a look of complete horror on her face. "Scully?"  
"Please tell me your kidding!!!" she gasped  
"No, what's wrong Scully..........SCULLY!!!!" he yelled and scrambled over to where she had passed out on the floor.

SCULLY'S EVALUATION FORM

Q. 1: Has your partner ever made a pass at you? 

A: Is the pope catholic?

Q. 2: Has your partner ever made a comment about the way you dress, that could be considered something more than a polite complement?

A: Well yeah, but I'm not sure it counts since I was wearing black lace and high heels at the time

Q. 3: Has your partner ever put you in a situation where you did not feel in control?

A: Why yes, I lost control because of my partner last night....more than once actually. However I hardly see that as a bad thing. 

Q. 4: Has your partner ever asked you a question you felt was inappropriate? (If so please write down the question and the circumstances in which it was asked)

A: The question was "Are you coming onto me?" I don't remember the circumstances that well, but if he was wearing that cute leather jacket I probably was.

Q. 5: Has your partner ever made any comments, that could be interpreted as sexual? (please write down all you can think of)

A: I lost count at # 500, 982

Q. 6: Have you ever caught you partner looking at you in a way that could be sexual?

A: Yes, he says he doesn't on duty but I know he's a liar! 

Q. 7: Has your partner ever touched you in an inappropriate place? 

A: Well I thought it was pretty inappropriate when he grabbed my ass in front of some 1st graders.

Q. 8: Has your partner ever exposed himself to you?

A: Sorry I couldn't answer this question because I was too busy rolling on the floor laughing

Q. 9: Have you ever gotten an explicit note, e-mail, or voice mail from your partner?

A: No, but your giving me some great ideas

Q. 10: Has your partner ever caused you any other discomfort?

A: Yeah a little, but it's okay, I've started doing yoga in the mornings now.

The end

**If you watch Friends yes I did get the idea for this from Rachel and Tag's story in TOW All The Candy**


End file.
